GWENDA BOND

Is This Thing On? And World Fantasy Schedule!

Hello, my darlings! I'm sorry to have vanished, but between launch month for Girl on a Wire and doing Lois edits (turned in Friday!) the month got away from me. First though, I want to say thank you to everyone who has read, bought, checked out from the library, reviewed or told someone about the circus book of my heart. If you haven't yet, well, there's no time like the present. *bats eyelashes* Especially after watching that Nik Wallenda city walk over Chicago. Wasn't that something? Thrilling.

It's been so long since I updated here, I've forgotten what I have and haven't mentioned, and I know I've missed a bunch of stuff too. So a rundown of a few things and info on what I'm doing at World Fantasy this coming weekend.

Girl things:

• Many thanks to the amazing Bianca Spriggs for including Girl on a Wire in her round-up for the Chevy Chaser of 10 Kentucky books from this year.
• At Intellectual Recreation, Readings on a Theme: Inspired by the Classics featuring Girl and several other fascinating-looking books, in which Girl is "the least obvious retelling of the bunch" and "full of mystery and the romance of the circus." *beams*
• I was delighted the book was included in the indefatigable Kelly Jensen's round-up of October through December (and a few early 2015) YA titles at Book Riot.
• Beth Revis, who was an invaluable crit partner on the very first draft of Girl on a Wire, featured it as one of her favorite fall reads this year for a fun giveaway and interview series about fall; you can see what she has to say and read my answers about my favorite fall reading and et cetera at her blog. Then read about all the other books, including Beth's latest, which you should get, stat.
• A shout-out to my former high school, since they gave me a shout-out on their FB page. Little did I see this coming back during my formative trouble-making days. ;-)

There have been a couple of really wonderful early reader reviews of Lois Lane: Fallout over at Tumblr, both thorough but not in the least spoilery:

• Here's the first from Maya; snippet: "Fallout exceeds everything I hoped it would be. Bond has captured Lois’s voice, infusing her with the Lois Lanes who have come before yet creating a fresh character with her own purpose."
• And here's another at Godzylla's Head; snippet: "It’s extremely nuanced, for all that it moves at a swift pace and is a fast read -- because you simply do not want to put it down once you’ve started it. Once you have finished it, you’re hungry for more. Best of all, this book is for everyone -- long-time Lois Lane fans and someone who may never have heard of her. It’s engaging, smart, and fun."

I'm reading instead of paneling at World Fantasy, early Thursday evening -- I can promise a little circus, a little Lois, and if there's time maybe a snippet of something else Christopher Rowe will pitch in a voice for. We'll see! Here's the details:

Reading: Gwenda Bond

Time: 5:30pm-6pm, Nov. 6, Fairfax

If you'll be there, you should come. I'll probably give away a copy of Girl, and I'll be happy to see you.

Linky Business

Still on deadline(s) so just dropping in here with a few quick things.

First off, SFX has a great preview of the Strange Chemistry imprint today by way of a fab interview with editrix-in-chief Amanda Rutter. It includes some newsy-ness, including that the imprint will be going to two titles per month starting the second half of next year. Check it out.

My sadness at the news that Margaret Mahy has passed on is immense. What a brilliant, beautiful genius of a writer she was. I wrote about two of my favorites of her books a few years ago; I sense a reread coming on. (I actually just reread her Alchemy a week or so ago, and was reminded of the fabulous strangeness that permeates her work.) I also highly recommend Karen Healey's Strange Horizons column about her. I hate folding this into a post about other things, but I didn't want to let it go uncommented on. R.I.P.

And, finally, switching gears completely--I'm SO excited to be part of the Summer YA Scavenger Hunt, coming your way very soon. Like all the other authors, I'll be contributing a signed copy to the prize package. My special content will be some information about my next book, a reveal of the title (yes, it actually has one now!) and a little draft front matter. Behind the cut you can get a glimpse at the details on all the participating authors, courtesy of Colleen Houck. What company to be in!

I Heart Monsters

Over at the Weird Fiction Review, 12 Days of Monsters continues with a whole slew of people talking about their favorite monsters. Here's a snippet of my response:

Greek mythology is filled with so many appealing (and unappealing) actual monsters that my choice may seem like a stretch of the term, but since she’s often portrayed as the ultimate monstrous mother I believe it fits. And you’ve probably guessed just from that vague description – yes, I’m talking about the one, the only, Medea, famed assassin of everyone from her own brother, to her ex’s would-be bride and father-in-law, and, of course, most damningly, her own children.

Go read 'em all. I'm going out in search of coffee and Floridian sunshine.

p.s. Thank you for all the cover art love. Next stop final cover! *beams*

#Topper Party

So TCM had a mini-Cary Grant marathon the other day, and one of the films included was Topper (which is also available on DVD, of course). Justine and I were bandying our love for it around with Ari, who had set up a timer but never seen it... And then Justine had the marvelous idea of live tweeting a simultaneous watch party from our respective corners of the world.

I'm stealing Scott's post about the relevant details, because lazy! but also busy! Here goes:

Next week I’m going to be live-tweeting an old movie with various friends around the world (namely, @justinelavaworm, @readingincolor, and @gwenda (ed. note from G--@scottwesterfeld is the other relevant twitter handle, of course). In other words, we’ll all be putting the DVD in at the same time, watching it in sync, and tweeting VERY witty things. Or just crapping on about Cary Grant’s amazing car, more likely. Why are we doing this? Because it seemed like fun, and @readingincolor hadn’t seen it yet.

The movie is called Topper, and is a screwball comedy about dying in a car accident and then messing with your banker as a ghost. (Seriously. People laughed at some weird stuff back then.)

If you’re on the twitter machine, please feel free to join in.

Time: 8:30PM US EST
Date: Tuesday Dec 27
(Sydney Time: 12:30PM Wed Dec 28)
Hashtag: #Topper

Join in if you like. It should be fun. After all, what is twitter for if not live tweeting old movies?

Friday Five

In which we return to random Fridays.

1. The children's and YA literature community lost one of its brightest lights this week, in L.K. Madigan (aka Lisa Wolfson). I never met Lisa in person, but we exchanged a few emails (always memorable, always funny), chatted on twitter and shared an agent. (In fact, I believe the weekend I signed with Jenn, Lisa was at a retreat with Laini Taylor; Laini wrote with congratulations and mentioned that at the retreat her friend had said her agent just signed someone new, and that the writer's name must be a pseudonym--to which Laini laughingly told her she didn't think so. I was thus thoroughly charmed by Lisa before we ever interacted.) She was someone I very much wanted and expected to meet someday. I was a huge fan of her work, and have the greatest of sympathies for those who knew her well. The outpouring of memories in the past couple of days is quite astounding. We should all be so lucky as to touch so many lives. A trust fund has been set up to help fund her son's college education; I can't think of a better way to remember her. Donate if you can.

2. I don't know where to go from there, but it didn't seem like something I could save for the end of this post.

3. I've been horribly behind and playing catch up this week. Also, trying to remind myself how many things I've gotten done in February, despite lots and lots of whirlwind, and thus not stress about the fact that I'm only resurfacing now. I've been in such a weird space of such busyness that I haven't even been watching The Vampire Diaries as it airs. I know! Worrisome. I start it, then decide to save it for later. (I have, however, been watching Fringe when it airs. Oh, show, you have me biting my nails. I will never have sympathy for Fauxlivia!) Please do not cancel this one, network. I want at least one more season.

4. I've been thinking a lot about all the advice that goes around for people at the beginning of their careers (a lot of it for before those careers really start). And the thing I keep coming back to is: It's different for everyone. Everyone's path is different. So don't worry too much about prescriptions (or proscriptions) that say you can do this, but not that; that if you do X, then you'll never do Y. Take the opportunities that come to you if they are ones you want to, and don't worry too much about the ones you don't take or that aren't right or that never come your way. Keep working. Behave with integrity. Be a professional, which means taking your work and your actions seriously. (Even before others do.) Something you do or say at some point will prickle someone's skin the wrong way, but if you're being thoughtful, professional, and acting with integrity, that's all you can do. Help other people when you can. Do what feels right and meaningful. Keep learning. The rest will sort itself out. I promise.

5. In very exciting news, my sweetie Christopher Rowe's first novel* Sandstorm is due out March 1. Which is next week. Eek! Yay! It's the fulfillment of a since-teenagedom dream he's had to write a novel set in the Forgotten Realms, novels that were very, very influential for him as he was growing up. And I couldn't be prouder or happier. I've been reading one of the author copies that showed up this week (you might find it in a few stores already, actually), and it's just as good as I remembered--full of exciting intrigue, and some of my favorite characters ever. As he described it in a recent interview: "Sandstorm is a fantasy novel that features action, adventure, gladiators, monsters, love, loss, revenge, some more monsters, genies, an assassin with the head of a crow, an ancient book of stories, twins, minotaurs, evil priests, epic battles, floating palaces, secret societies, and the finest circus in all the Forgotten Realms." If you like high fantasy (or have ever played D&D), give it a try. To celebrate the release, I'll be hosting a Dungeons & Dragons Salon with the thoughts of some other very smart, excellent writers for whom gaming and/or the related fantasy novels were also influential. So make sure you drop by on Tuesday.

*He's hard at work on the second one now, Sarah Across America, and it is DIVINE. Although the fact he writes on the typewriter and doesn't like leaving a sheet in it overnight means that he frequently ends the day in mid-sentence, on the biggest cliffhangers ever. My nerves! I can't take it.

Electronic Brains, Dream Mash-Up No. 1*

Today I am busy with many things, including an overdue auction critique, so this will be short and silly.

Remember when Kelly was on her blog tour and she proposed combining Bringing Up Baby with paranormal romance? This is kind of like that.

As a sidenote to a conversation at World Fantasy with Ted and Christopher, I realized that the computers in Desk Set and WarGames are--more or less--the same computer.

Joshua

meets

EMERAC.

Would you like to play a game, Bunny?

*An occasional series.

Monday Five

Because I haven't managed to do the random post on Fridays lately, and really, why not on Monday?

1) Lots of people are recommending scary reading in honor of Halloween, which is a lovely idea that makes me happy. I always struggle with making lists, afraid (ha) to leave things out. Anyway, I've been doing lots of scary-ish research reading lately, primarily about alchemists and their alchemical tricks, for the current work-in-progress. And I'm rereading Stephen King's Danse Macabre for the first time since high school, and finding it just as absorbing as I did then. (In addition to Cybils reading, natch.) I recommend tracking down the November issue of Harper's for Téa Obreht's fabulous essay Twilights of the Vampires: Hunting the Real-Life Undead, a delightful travelogue through Serbia and Croatia to examine the roots of the really old stories. You'll like it.

2) It's my intention to (finally!) finish a draft of the aforementioned work-in-progress by the time we load up the car and drive to World Fantasy on Friday. This is highly doable. And then I can fix it.

3) I like it when friends are on book tour, especially when they come near us. Spent a delightful day in Cincy yesterday with Scott and Justine (and other wonderful localish folks, Scalzi and Megan). And then there's WFC and its horde of delightful types coming up in just a few days. A girl could get spoiled.

4) Apparently the National Book Foundation doesn't believe in fairy tales, at least not as something that qualifies for its awards? Which is crazy. Kate Bernheimer and Marie Tatar are on the case.

5) If I owe you an email, you will get it today. Promise.

Llamas On The Lam

Escaped llamas named Felicity and Prism--I love this story:

Two llamas escaped from a farm near the Louisville Zoo early Friday, causing police and animal services to track them through the surrounding neighborhoods.

One llama, named Felicity, made it pretty far, eventually getting stopped on Harvard Drive near Bardstown Road in the Douglass Loop. A second one, Prism, was located on the west side of Newburg Road, not far from the farm where she lives.

Nefarious beer bottle activity suspected as the cause, even.

Oversaturated With Meaning

Errol Morris responds to some of the letters he received about his characteristically excellent seven-part piece "Bamboozling Ourselves" (scroll to the bottom to start at the beginning), about the Vermeer forgeries of Han van Meegeren during the World War II era. The whole thing is full of provocative ideas and well worth your time, but this caught my eye:

I was standing in the Mauritshuis on a visit to The Hague. And there it is, hanging on the wall, one of the most famous paintings in the world, "The Girl with the Pearl Earring." O.K. It was something of a letdown. (I had a similar response to the Mona Lisa and the Botticelli Venus.) It was actually – at least for me – impossible to look at the painting as a painting. Clearly, it has been singled out for a reason, but I am no longer sure of what that reason might be. It is such an iconic image – reproduced hundreds of thousands, if not millions of times – that it is unclear what I am responding to. Is it its transcendent fame; its ubiquity – to the point of kitschiness; its real or imagined value, $100 million, $200 million? Or its provenance? The feeling that I am in the presence of Vermeer. But one thing I know for sure: it is impossible to respond to it as just another painting.

Who hasn't had this reaction before one famous piece of art or another?

Cooking With M

From Julia Child's New York Times' obituary in 2004:

After World War II broke out, she signed up for intelligence work with the Office of Strategic Services, hoping to become a spy, but was sent off as a file clerk to Ceylon. There she met Paul Child, the head of a chart-making division who was 10 years older and several inches shorter. He was also an artist, a poet and a serious food lover who opened up her taste horizons on their travels in China.

From today's Washington Post story about information in newly declassified records:

Before Julia Child became known to the world as a leading chef, she admitted at least one failing when applying for a job as a spy: impulsiveness.

At 28 as an advertising manager at W&J Sloane furniture store in Beverly Hills, Calif., Child clashed with new store managers and left her job abruptly.

"I made a tactical error and was out," she explained in a handwritten note attached to her application to join the Office of Strategic Services, a World War II-era spy agency. "However, I learned a lot about advertising and wish I had been older and more experienced so that I could have handled the situation, as it was a most interesting position."

Child was not yet married and was applying for the job under her maiden name, McWilliams, according to previously top-secret records released by the National Archives on Thursday. She was hired in the summer of 1942 for clerical work with the intelligence agency and later worked directly for OSS Director William Donovan, the personnel records show.

Eye Witnesses

The NYT currently features a fascinating piece that documentarian Errol Morris put together about the power of images and the ease of faking them and what that might mean in the larger cultural context. It's mostly a conversation with a couple of experts in digital photography and fakery. Here's an excerpt from part featuring professor Hany Farid:

ERROL MORRIS: Yes. There's a remarkable story about the forging of the Hitler diaries. The forger was so prolific, he created so many forgeries — letters, watercolors, diaries, etc. — that handwriting analysts (charged with the task of authenticating the diaries) took writing examples done by the forger thinking they were genuine examples of Hitler’s handwriting and compared them to the diaries.  They authenticated the diaries on that basis.[10]  Often we make a comparison between something that we believe is real and something that we believe is fake. I guess the moral of the story is we should always consider the possibility that we may be comparing something fake with something else that is fake.

HANY FARID: It's sort of like Rembrandt, right? His body of work has been shrinking for decades now, right? And so what's considered to be his body of work is completely different now, cause he was faked so heavily. It's a good question. The reason why we believe that the one with the four missiles is fake is that there is pretty strong, at least circumstantial, evidence that the cloning was there. The plumes of smoke look very, very similar. There are a lot of little pieces. But also, when you clone with a standard clone tool, there's like a soft cloning, so it does a little bit of like alpha matting, so that it's not a hard edge. And you see along the rocks, there's definitely some funny business going on. Again, visually it's not a certainty. But it certainly looks more suspicious.

The whole piece is well worth reading. And makes me want to revisit the First Person series, which I adored when it was on. I still vividly recall the episode about the little gray man.

8

The New York Times has a fun little slideshow in celebration of the number 8 (in honor of today's date - 8/8/08), featuring the kind of lists miscellanies are famous for.

Turtle Power

That would be Emma the Dog investigating an interloper in our backyard yesterday. This turtle doesn't seem anywhere near as talented as this guy in D.C., but all he'd find in our back yard is extra yellow bikes and they're pretty easy to spot.

(Poor college student in that story, huh? Bummer, dude.)

Lessons to Grasshopper, No. 23

There is but one cure for a slight summer cold: sushi and Batman.

Have a good weekend, everybody!

Punking the Product

I'm sure this circulated ages ago, but I just saw it courtesy of the lovely Erin -- the Amazon user comments on Tuscan Whole Milk by the gallon.

Indiana Jones in Egypt, Etc.

The NYT has an interesting story about archeologists digging into the work-a-day world of ancient Egypt, as opposed to the traditional big money pyramids and the like:

"This is a really amazing site, at the cutting-edge of recent Egypt archaeology," said Stuart Tyson Smith of the University of California, Santa Barbara, who was not involved in the project. "Digging into towns, you get the full range of life, not the very narrow view of society as seen from the top, from the rich and elite."

Mark Lehner, an Egyptologist who uncovered remains of settlements for workers who built the pyramids at Giza, said that at Dr. Moeller’s site he inspected layers of sediments showing occupation extending back 5,000 years to the dawn of Egyptian civilization and forward to the early Islamic period in the first millennium A.D. The silos are near temple ruins from about 300 B.C.

And I want a pangolin. Unrelated, I know, but so cute.

Oh, and while I'm being random, the NYT also has this story on Jamaican jerk, with the following quote from Zora Neale Hurston:

The American writer and anthropologist Zora Neale Hurston chronicled an overnight boar hunt with the Maroons in 1939. "Towards morning we ate our fill of jerk pork," she wrote. "It is better than our American barbecue. It is hard to imagine anything better than pork the way the Maroons jerk it."

Said story made me want to go back to Jake's and ask around to find the closest roadside jerk that weekend...

Post Offices Hate Babies

My favorite citizen campaign site yet. (Via Ed.)

Hidden Treasure

The NYT has a story about a trunk of junk bought at a yard sale in Kentucky that turned out to be full of correspondence and prints by Weegee, the (in)famous New York photog. One letter sent from Munich reads:

"Looks like the picture won't be finished on time," the letter explains. "It rains every day and we can’t find 2 midgets, so it looks like I'll be here at least 2 more weeks."

Still mysterious is how the trunk ended up in Kentucky in the first place.

Blood Sport

Sally Jenkins is always good when she writes about cycling (and particularly the Tour de France), and now she proves herself insightful on horse racing too. She has an excellent column today about the tragedy of Eight Belles' death and the causes behind it:

There is no turning away from this fact: Eight Belles killed herself finishing second. She ran with the heart of a locomotive, on champagne-glass ankles for the pleasure of the crowd, the sheiks, oilmen, entrepreneurs, old money from the thousand-acre farms, the handicappers, men in bad sport coats with crumpled sheets full of betting hieroglyphics, the julep-swillers and the ladies in hats the size of boats, and the rest of the people who make up thoroughbred racing. There was no mistaking this fact, too, as she made her stretch run, and the apologists will use it to defend the sport in the coming days: She ran to please herself.

Calling All Aspies (And Family Members)

Christopher is trying to finish an end of the semester project for his Linguistics class, looking at the speaking traits of people with Asperger's Syndrome. He has designed a quick, handy online survey and needs responses from folks with an AS diagnosis OR who live with someone with AS and are familiar with their conversational style.

Anonymous, of course, and you will earn both our undying gratitude -- anonymously -- for filling it out. Please pass on to anyone you know who fits the bill.

Mercury Retrograde?

Today's Annoying Parts of Life: 1) tire with a hole in it (fixed, and even for free), 2) hot water heater problems plus (with the plus upping the total to YEEOUCH 3-grand), and 3) dirty hair (see hot water heater problems) and bad sleep last night leading to a general state of fuzzy-headedness.

It's a nice day outside, at least, and these things are minor in the scheme of, and too shall pass. Etc. (It would be, perhaps, easier if I wasn't on antibiotics that prevent the consumption of wine. Three. More. Days.)

And now that I've TMI-ed you to death, here's a happiness-inducing thing: Graeme McMillan's list of X-Men Who Should Be X-ed Out. I'm still mulling whether I have any additions, but have got to concur with Angel and some of the other conclusions*. Your own nominations welcome in the comments.

Also, if you're a moneybags and would, y'know, like to send me 3-grand, I have a use for it**.

*Who knew that Australian teleporters suck so hard?

**No, I'm not going post-apocalypse. I should be able to shower when I get home. Poor, but clean.

Ghosts in the RSS Feed

Theresa Duncan set up an autopost for today featuring a Dick Cavett anecdote about Basil Rathbone, a friend's car crash and a message from a medium. Apparently, another will appear on New Year's Eve.

Olympia is Burning

This striking image by photojournalist Petros Giannakouris accompanied today's Associated Press story about the massive fires sweeping across Greece. Firefighters were able to stop fires just before they destroyed the ruins of Ancient Olympia, but others continue to burn.

Just Saying

The NYT profiles the deal-breaking content of some apartments. One rich, strange bachelor has faded, decades-old kiddie sheets (because they don't make them in adult sizes anymore*):

“I was dating this very nice woman, I thought,” says Mr. Podell. “I was ready and she was ready to do the big deed. I take her to my apartment, go into the bedroom, and fling back the sheets, and she said, ‘My husband had these sheets and he was a mean-hearted son of a bitch and you must be like him and I’m leaving.’ ”

Could it be maybe, just maybe, that the problem is that Mr. Podell refers to sex as "the big deed"?

But stuffed baby seal guy's just getting a bad rap. Klimt posters, however? Buffy already handled that one.

Gavin, let me know if any of these people write in to Dear Aunt G: I am ready with the advice bazooka.

*This guy is a millionaire and yet not enterprising enough to get some custom sheets made? The women SHOULD be running.

Japanese Snow Monkeys!

Live Cam! (Via Jenny D.)

Dead White Guys Rule

The Atlantic Monthly has compiled a list of the 100 most influential Americans. I don't know if it's more of a commentary on the list or America that there's so little diversity on it. Full list behind the cut, for the curious.

You Know You Said It

Awwwww.

Why does China hate the guanmao?

See slideshow for more cuteness.

I Heart Dress-Up

One of the best things online this week has been all the wonderful photos from Comic Con of People In Costume. (PICs, if you must have an acronym.) Frankly, I find all the sort of Ren Faire-reject pirates* a little sad, but then there's shots like this one from Wired. There's more where that came from, but Theo Black's two sets are my faves so far.

*This is a compliment to the Ren Faire, not an insult. Really.

Well, This Is Good News

"Witchcraft ban ends in Zimbabwe":

Zimbabwe has lifted a ban on the practice of witchcraft, repealing legislation dating back to colonial rule.

From July the government acknowledges that supernatural powers exist - but prohibits the use of magic to cause someone harm.

In 1899, colonial settlers made it a crime to accuse someone of being a witch or wizard - wary of the witch hunts in Europe a few centuries earlier which saw many people burned at the stake after such accusations.

But to most Zimbabweans, especially those who grew up in the rural areas, it has been absurd to say that the supernatural does not exist.

In fact, it is not hard to find vivid stories about the use of magic.

Alfred, for example, believes that he was bewitched at work some years ago, making him partly bald.

Now THAT, friends, is a great sentence. (Via Judith Berman.)

 

April Fool's

Spotted two so far:

Locus Online with the usual run of gags (a little disappointing this year, for me anyway)
Kingdom of Loathing (just go there -- read through the titles)

Updated: Teresa Nielsen Hayden at Making Light points out several more

AND: Ed Champion is cracking me up.

Case of the...

My Edna St. Vincent Millay is missing.

Searching for Something

Inspired by Justine (though I'm too lazy to link to the pages here these actually led to), random search strings that led people here in the last 24 hours:

El Monte Calle
What year is Matt Czuchry
Silly Games
curtis sittenfeld "the man of my dreams"
joan d. vinge
CENSORED
paparrazi of milo and alexis
"Dave Schwartz" + weather
weevil + veronica + music videos
Logan and Veronica wallpaper
Dan Chiasson and Justin Tussing
Firebirds Rising
real life novel princess
teapots Austen
mud pies in Haiti

(Who are Milo and Alexis? Oh and welcome, Veronica Mars fans/Gilmore Girls fans/Old Man Sittenfeld...)

Heart to Heart

g1. Dana's collected some choice anti-Valentines from her friends over at #1HS. Her own is about a particularly noxious college neighbor:

My neighbor in college--a girl from the bayous named (I shit you not) Katrina--would appear on my doorstep daily, Schneider-like, to bend my ear, always with terrible news. Sometimes it was because she had rescued half-dead cats. Sometimes it was because the half-dead cats had peed on her bed.

2. The fabulous Hank Stuever has a piece about Lloyd Dobler:

Heaps of devotional words have been written about Lloyd Dobler. The early stages of a popularized Internet seemed to exist for people to make Lloyd Dobler references, and Lloyd Dobler tribute pages that linger ("Last updated on July 1, 1997"). There's a fairly successful Wheaton-based band called the Lloyd Dobler Effect, which has toured forever. (Sadly, a Hootie and the Blowfish comparison in a review of the Lloyd Dobler Effect's work prevents us from going any further.)

Clop, Clop Go the Cows

Best cycling photo ever.

Reasons to Love Dolly, No. 74

Awhile back, Dolly Parton started a charity called the Imagination Library, which mails a book a month to all children from birth to 5 years of age in Sevier County, TN, regardless of income. The program is spreading. Dolly sez:

"They call me the Book Lady. That's what the little kids say when they get their books in the mail. They think I bring them and put them in the mailbox myself, like Peter Rabbit or something," she said, laughing.

Where she grew up in tiny Locust Ridge, children's books and education were luxuries. "My mother was married when she was in the seventh grade, so a lot of my people didn't get a chance to get an education," she said. "Imagination Library was really born out of my need to try to help people knowing what a handicap it was with a lot of my relatives."

Odds and Ends De Nada, Alex

Little things, not quite hangovers.

• I'm sure you've seen this elsewhere, but here's John Joseph Adams' instructions for more formally expressing your feelings about the end of Sci Fiction: Everyone who is dismayed over the death of SCI FICTION, email SCIFI.com at [email protected] and tell them of your displeasure. Also, if you want to write a long, detailed, and eloquent letter that you'd like the community to see, send a note to Science Fiction Weekly too, at [email protected], and maybe they'll publish it in their letters column.
• Speaking of which, this probably isn't a bad time to support other short fiction outlets in the genre that are consistently excellent, such as Strange Horizons, The Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction, Asimov's, Realms of Fantasy, Black Static (formerly The Third Alternative), insert your own here, etc., etc. Or how about newcomers the Fairy Tale Review or Fantasy magazine (which little birdies say includes lots of X chromosomes on the TOC)? One of the things that has always made the genre feel unique to me is the value that's still placed on short fiction; let's keep it that way.
• The windshield wipers decided to up and die on the way home from work today, leading to waiting for C to come follow me home, a fifteen minute interlude that led to utter exhaustion. And our heat is currently blinking in and out (don't worry, guesties, it'll be fixed by the time you get here) at the exact same time it's finally getting autumn cold. And I have to write anyway. Whine. That is all.

Not If You're Chinese* (Updated)

Tod Goldberg reveals: Dean Koontz = Batshit Crazy:

He then went on to read us the letters he'd sent to the Japanese chairman of the film company in question where he asked repeatedly to have his name removed from the film. The letters were about, generally, the US kicking Japanese ass in World War II, the inability of the Japanese to defend themselves against Godzilla, some more fascinating invective about the US defeating the Japanese, a touching bit about Pearl Harbor, another about the Bataan Death March, a touch more about the Japanese surrender and then, of course, a bit about Mothra, too. Each letter was addressed to "Mr. Teriyaki." (Internment camps were not mentioned in any of the letters, which I assume was a simple omission on Mr. Koontz's part and will be rectified in the future.)

Stunningly, the audience thrilled to the stories! The laughter cascaded about the room! People dabbed tears! Do you have any stories about your hatred of the Jews, Mr. Koontz? Any good ones about the Muslim world? How about a notation on some more racial stereotypes you've used when negotiating your name off other shitty movies?

Read the whole thing. Some of you have heard me rant about Dean Koontz's dog Trixie being forced to write books (and apparently make New Year's resolutions) in the past. Free Trixie! Whatever you do, don't tell him she's a Japanese spy!

*This will only make sense to you if you happened to be at the ICFA banquet of 2000-aught2. Suffice to say, some of us have witnessed similiarly baffling speechery.

Updated: I missed Lee Goldberg's post on same, which features an account of an exchange with Dean Koontz after reading his post. I particularly love the concessions he made:

I got a call today from Dean Koontz, who wasn't pleased about the comments here. I apologized to him for using "Sambo" and "Kike" as comparisons for his use of "Mr. Teriyaki" to refer to the Asian exec. He found the use of those words pejorative and said they mischaracterized the tenor of his speech. I agreed. So I  have changed them to "Mr. Fried Chicken" and "Mr. Matzoball." I believe his speech was offensive and in bad taste -- and I reiterated that belief to him in our phone conversation.

Updated: The LA Times covers the speech and resulting dust-up and Tod Goldberg reacts, once again in hilarious fashion.

The Pleasure of Good Company

Steve Martin has been awarded the eighth annual Mark Twain Prize for American Humor. The ceremony sounds fun:

Dave Barry, who wrote jokes for Martin's Oscar-hosting gig two years ago, mentioned that he performed his Academy Awards monologue with his fly open. "And," said Barry, " I think it says something about Steve as a performer, and as a man, that no one noticed."

The most off-message message of the evening came from Larry David, who told a hilarious shaggy-dog tale in which Martin mistreats a homeless guy, plagiarizes a Dorothy Parker story, abuses a cat, acts boorish in a theater and finally insults David's Jewish heritage. "Maybe next time you'll give this award to someone who deserves it," said David. "Someone whose personal conduct is beyond reproach. Someone like . . . uh, you'll figure it out."

Little Things

While Harper's doesn't put everything online, it turns out they do put a fair amount of things from the Readings section at the front of the magazine up. (And let's be honest: isn't that the best part of Harper's? It 's always been my favorite.) Some Nigerians believe phone calls are killing people. The customs of the Waorani tribe of Ecuador. The devil's edict. A series of escalating emails between Judd Apatow and Mark Brazill.

Happy sigh.